Audio and Video tags

Since Mistress wanted me to look into web design again since I brought up I had one time wanted to do that for a career I've been searching for what I can find on HTML 5 etc to try and get back in the swing of things. Found something that would have been helpful to know a bit ago when I was trying to find a audio player for a post that I was going to include a audio podcast with I believe.

Anyways I discovered there is a video and a audio tag now, but unfortunately neither works in Internet Explore and only certain types of audio / video are supported depending on your browser. I don't like Internet Explorer anyways so, its fine with me really. Below is a video that will work in Google Chrome and Safari.

Safari will allow you to watch it in full screen, while Google Chrome will simply allow you to play it. Don't watch the video far if your not ok with watching something Atheist related, it was just the first online video I was able to find a m4v file to include. If anyone knows any sites that can get the link to the mp4 etc from video sites, let me know please.

Here is a audio from Masocast episode 36, this will only work in Google Chrome and Safari again, Firefox only supports ogg format.

Hopefully this will become a more standard way of putting video into webpages without using flash. You can try watching YouTube videos by the way I found out today using HTML 5 by going to YouTube HTML5 opt-in.

If you can't see either the video are the audio on this post, then you just have to trust me that they are there. Or are you going to be one of those the cake is a lie people?


Some time ago, I asked lion to start keeping a journal. It was meant to be a tool to help him focus a little more on his submission, since I know he still has questions about that, and to give him a place to write thoughts and questions so that we could discuss them later. I know only too well what it's like to think of something I'd like to talk about, then completely forget what it was when I finally have the chance to sit down with someone to discuss it.

I know he struggled with it for a while, but he's been doing quite well with it lately, and has been typing up his entries and sending them to me so that I can read what he's written. I don't think he realizes it, but I can see how much he's grown in his acceptance of his role in my life just in the past few months reflected in the journal entries he's shared with me. Every little bit of growth I see, in his submission and in his life in general, I celebrate, even though I don't always discuss it with him. I think putting too much emphasis on it would make him self conscious, so mostly I just mind my tongue and continue doing what I think needs to be done.

But I am proud of him. Not that long ago, almost every post would have contained some reference to the denial he's been undergoing, or a comment about his desire to cum. But recently, if it's mentioned at all, it's mentioned in passing. It's more of a statement then an attempt at a subtle request to be allowed to cum. I know that he wants and needs me to have that control over him, but at the same time, for so long he's been struggling against it. Seeing that acceptance at last makes me want to do little handsprings of joy, and then swoop him up and kiss him all over.

And I'm also proud of him for the recent posts pertaining more to his personal life than directly to our relationship. I want him to be happy, and I know he's not happy right now. If I can help guide him in his quest to find a career, or even a sideline job, that satisfies and fulfills him the way his current job doesn't, then I feel honoured for being allowed that role.

I know that our limited time together has been a hardship for him. It hasn't been easy for me either. But I look forward to opening my email every morning and finding a message from him containing his journal entries for the previous day. I love having that little glimpse into his life that I can't always share with him. And I really love finding something in his entries that gives me a reason to celebrate.


Chasity, Cuckolding, and no sex?

A pair of lions copulating in the Maasai Mara,...Image via Wikipedia
Was looking on Fetlife this morning to see if there was any response to a post I replied to last night and was completely stupified by a response that was posted, the only other response that had been posted, the only response that has been posted as of yet.
...I could see some of the guys who get carried away hurting their relationship... I know it would be detrimental to be locked up much more than a week... We both love sex and we dont beleive in Cuckholding... we feel that would hurt our relationship. There are many who go full years with out sleeping with their wives. Thats not for me. I feel that if implimented correctly it will do only great things. Some slaves focus more on the chastity than their key holder. they say i want to be locked for ever, they are saying they dont want to have sex and that could hurt a monogamous relationship or any relationship for that matter.
Main thing I could think of reading this, was what the fuck is this guy talking about?  I think he has some rather limited ideas that either come from ignorance or..well I don't really know what?  Pretty sure he doesn't really know a whole lot about chastity, and probably not cuckolding or why some people may just have a general lack of sex compared to others.

The reply came from a post I saw in the male Chastity and Orgasm tease and denial group on Fetlife, titled "Has chastity damaged your marriage?"  The poster seemed to be looking for what could go wrong with chastity.  Its the wrong question to be asking really, but I'll try to get that.

The original poster said
I'm just wondering if there are any horror stories of how chastity has been damaging to a relationship, and if so any recommendations on how to avoid those problems.
And my reply was
Just looking through some post looking for something else, but was curious so I clicked. I'm not exactly currently in chastity but Mistress and I have been looking at devices for me and trying to decide on one.

Only way I can see the chastity being harmful to a relationship is if the chastity is a must for one of the people and a turn off for the other person.

If its is a absolute must for one the people involved then it should be communicated previously, preferably before marriage even happened, and tried before getting married as well.

But the main thing I just communicate honestly and openly about each others expectations as to the chastity and all should be fine. Always have open communication going on how each other is feeling.

Also remember just cause one person is in chastity, doesn't mean the other person can't be intimate, I mean thats part of the fun right? someone in chastity being teased to hell and un-able to get hard or do a damn thing about it? Who can be used to please their partner with no hope of release themselves?
Honesty and open communication is really the best way, and something that has to happen throughout a relationship that includes chastity, or even if it doesn't.  With chastity though you need to make sure that both of you are communicating about how everything is going and how you are feeling, and just cause your relationship includes chastity, does not mean that it necessarily has to always.  Sometimes it may be needed to take a break and focus on each other.

The person that replied after me brought up cuckolding, and lack of sex as potential problems with chastity, and far as I'm concerned these are very different issues then the chastity itself.

Lets start with cuckolding to start with.  Cuckolding for those of you who are not aware of the term is a word means, "The normal definition of a cuckold is a married man whose wife cheats on him with or without his knowledge (it is usually with the male's knowledge and sometimes consent, to be a true 'fetish'). A cuckold fetishist is aware of his partner's activity and derives sexual pleasure from it." according to part of the wikipedia on it and my best understanding of it, so we will go with that.

Regardless to the length of chastity, weeks, months, years, that your partner should have to go out and find sex elsewhere, is just plain silly.  Just cause they might be in chastity for some time, doesn't mean that there is no sex to be had for their partner with them.  Get a strap-on, let your partner ride the device if its possible for them to obtain climax that way and they enjoy it.

I like some of the stories I've read over at Unspeakable Axe on chastity, and describing some hot love making sessions  while in chastity.  They are very very hot and I really wish I could read more of them.  If anyone knows of some other good places with stories like those, please tell me..please? puppy dog eyes?

The lack of sex thing could take far more to try and talk about so I'm going to try and be as quick and to the point as I can about it.  Sometimes in people's forties their libido takes a nose dive.  It is pretty normal, and doesn't always mean the end of sex.   And again, just cause someone is in chastity doesn't mean that there partner isn't getting any sex from them either.


Missing Private Time With Mistress

Mistress AbsoluteImage via Wikipedia
Really been missing having time with Mistress.  I know that right now she is having a rough time, but at the same time I just want things to go back the way they where, when we could get on skype and talk more verbally, or would call now and then in the morning, but also know at the same time that even if she was not in a bit of a rough spot, that would not happen as often as I might like.

But she is my love, my mistress and would do anything just to be able to hear her voice more, but aside from that I just want to be able to do more for her.  Feel like a horribly selfish person that even though something is going on with her, that I just sorta want to say, look at me, I'm right over here...cross a country border, and several states away...but I'm here...aren't I wonderful-ish?

Then I remember that I haven't really been doing as much as I should be doing either even without talking to her, without those reminders that I am hers.  Course should not really need reminding when I wear one around my neck, ever day, all day, when I shower, work, sleep, etc.

I have not been kneeling every morning like I am suppose to.  Haven't been eating breakfast, I try to, but then last few mornings especially I have been getting up late, and just sort of space a fair number of things.  I been trying to keep up with writing in my journal and been meaning to get around to scanning or photoing the pages, but I don't know if D has a scanner, and for some reason haven't just taking my camera and taking a couple snap shots of pages.  Not sure how well she would be able able to read my handwriting anyways, so been thinking I should just write some of the entries if I promised not to modify what I wrote and just type what I wrote on the paper.

This post is from my journal, though its not word for work, I'm expanding a bit and re-organizing some thoughts, but for the most part is what I was thinking about today.  One thing that annoys me sometimes when I write is I will have thought out this well put paragraph in my head, but could not write it down right then at the time and later when I go to finally write it down, I wonder what happened to that paragraph I was thinking about?

Lately just feels like a void has been creeping in between me Mistress, and I'm trying as hard as I can to see her through it.  I'm really hoping that when this fall comes that it will help more solidify things between me and her and bring us closer then I even dream possible, but I also need to work harder at budgeting my spending so that I actually will have money saved up this fall, cause I won't be satisfied if it gets this fall and I'm as broke as I am now.  Need to look more into where we are going to be staying this fall as well, find somewhere private.

Just as a aside from the main point of this post I'm glad that there are people who enjoy what I write aside from Cridhe, though the main point of writing most this is for her.  I'm glad for the praise that I've gotten from some of the people over kittenplay.org which I joined not long ago just to sorta see what it was about after finding the link from Miss and pet over on Tumblr.


Things I wouldn't want to try

Been meaning to work on this for a bit now, is part two of my recent homework assignment my Mistress Cridhe had giving me.  The first part is in the previous post I wrote lionheart's fears.  While since I'm home and Mistress wasn't responding to my I'm home message and now has gone offline..*sighs*.  I started to look a bit to try and write my assignment.

I was at first thinking of writing it on CBT, or cock and ball torture for those unfamiliar with the acronym in BDSM.  As I was thinking more about what she wanted me to do though, thought well, perhaps should just do it on knife play maybe, as that is something I'd be more afraid to do.  I don't like the thought of being cut very much.

Doing a little searching I came across in Wikipedia, that knife play is considered part of edge play and maybe edge play covers enough of the things I wouldn't want to do.  Edge Play according to Wikipedia is the following.
In BDSM, edgeplay is a subjective term for types of sexual play that are considered to be pushing on the edge of the traditional safe, sane and consensual creed.
In other words edge play is play that if not careful, and even when being careful could cause some harm.  I'm not really sure if CBT falls under this, but depending on what is done I suppose it could, such as the photo I saw over at fetlife where a guy had nailed hammered I guess into his scrotum; The link to the comment a friend of mine on the photo isn't showing anymore so can't link to it.  Though I suppose that is just as well as I don't want to see it again.

What I don't like about the thought of CBT, is that area is quiet sensitive and I wouldn't want some of the things that I've seen searching for male submission done to me in that area.  I could possibly see a ball stretcher, that would be fine I think, but things like stepping on my cock and balls, least with a fair bit of pressure behind it, rather not thanks.  Certainly don't want nails puncturing it or anything rather extreme.  Maybe could do clamps, but don't know about that.  Rather tempted to pick up some clamps to try anyways.

Anyways back to knifes and other cutting instruments, also things like needles and so on.  I'm not a fan of the sight of blood, nor am I of being cut, though some of the images of the aftermath of cutting can be kinda interesting to look at.  See the photo I included and also this one over at Maybe Maimed but Never Harmed.

It is honestly very striking and I like the way it looks, and also linking to two photo's from Maybe Maimed cause the link came up while searching for some posts and they are of one of my favorite podcast person on kink on tap, Maymay.

Anyways I think part of the reason I don't like the thought of blood drawn, no matter the method, is when I was younger I was having blood drawn at least once a month, though seems like it may have been more often then that.  Not sure I remember why I had to have the blood drawn though.  But I get a little queasy at the sight of blood.

One of the other types of play that was mentioned under edge play was breath play, which is much as it sounds controlling the breathing of someone.  While for the most part I think if someone was trying to actually cut of my air would send me into panic, the thought of Cridhe's hand around my throat applying pressure is somehow very calming.  I almost think that is a bit of a contradiction, but I don't know.


Thur HNT #1

Kneeling in the morning like I'm suppose to

lionheart's fears

4 piercees at the Death Equinox '99 convention...Image via Wikipedia

Mistress asked me to write down a list of my fears for her.  The list is actually rather short, but here goes.

  1. Heights:  I'm not very big fan of heights, though that has usually never stopped me from climbing trees.  Also think this one of the reasons I don't think I could enjoy suspension play.
  2. Needles: I am defiantly not a very big fan of needle play ideas either, though sometimes some of the photo's of people with needles in them in patterns can be a bit interesting, I don't like needles for a couple reasons.  One they are needles ... and two I don't like the sight of blood if there was any.
  3. Crowded Places: I can't standing being boxed in by a large number of people, I get nervous and not really sure why.  I don't think it has to do with confined spaces per-say but being in a enclosed area with allot of people makes me just want to get out.
  4. The Dark: Well I'm not overly scared of the dark, not being able to see so well at night freaks me out a little bit.
Think that is about it really.  What sorta of things are you my readers afraid of?


Why I like the idea of chastity

The Curve chastity cage. Note the serial numbe...Image via Wikipedia
Thought perhaps I should write something about what intrigues me about male chastity and why I would want to be in a chastity cage, and controlled in this manner. Been thinking about writing this for a awhile, but was not really sure where I should start.

Guess the easiest place for me to start is with what first, turned me onto the idea of how hot male chastity could be. I was doing some searching, looking for blogs by male submissive writers, something that is apparently rather hard to do. I would come across a large number of sites from a female submissive point of view and skip right past it. Perhaps not the most conductive thing to my search to find myself as a submissive, and perhaps I should try searching again sometime for just general submissive blogs.

Anyways one of the blogs I found at first was by someone who doesn't claim to be submissive and if he is or not, is not really something I feel privy to discuss as I'm not always certain what submission really is. but the blog was titled, "The Edge of Vanilla." was a interesting title and guess what grabbed my attention to click the link and take a look at what it was about.  I was glancing over some of the post and found one that I started read I was amazed at how hot I was finding it.  I'm not really certain, it could have been this post, "Coming Together: 2" or another. but one thing was sure, I was aroused.
“Mmmm. You know how long it’s going to be this time?”
“However long you decide,” I answered.
She closed her eyes again. “That’s right. You know why?”
“Because I’m in charge,” she said simply.
“I want you to be in charge,” I whispered into her ear. “I want you to let it go as long as you want. Maybe we’ll take this out for a whole year.”
“Oooh… Jesus…”
I lifted myself up higher to watch her face while she came.
She was smiling.
Afterward, I removed the dil… er, her cock, and held her.
“Driving all the way here, I was thinking that I needed to have a talk with you about this,” I told her. “I’ve been hoping that we could change what we’ve been doing, but, wow, I didn’t expect this.”
“How are you feeling about it?” she asked.
“Exhilarated. Like, it’s really exciting, but I’m a little scared, too, at what you might actually do.” I kissed her. “We’re going to need to talk about this later.”
She nodded. “We’ll have plenty of time later,” she said. “Are you horny, yet?”
“I’m not really sure. I’m excited and aroused, but I’m oddly satisfied. Thank you, this was really good for me.”
I was surprised I was being aroused by it, but more so by the idea that I might actually want to be in a chastity cage, or just plain denied release.  It was hot the idea of giving up control over when and if I came to someone.

What I like about is she gets to decide when I cum, how I cum, and could possibly, where I cum.  If she text-ed me and told me she wanted me to cum on my next lunch, I'm pretty sure I would go right to the bathroom and cum for Her, though that would be a bit embarrassing and would have to worry about people ease dropping.  I don't want a set sort of schedule for it either, I just want her to decide ok, tonight I am going to take you, fuck you and let you cum, or maybe just fuck me then say..no..no..hold back, you are not allowed tonight.

The combination of typing this and talking to Cridhe right now is a bit much as well, getting hard just thinking about this, and wanting release so bad, but not being giving permission.  Is such sweet torment.

At some point I should be getting the CB The Curve chastity device, and I so can't wait to be strapped into it.  Should be interesting, though wondering how I will handle Mistress' torment while being caged when I won't even be allowed to get hard..and is almost counterintuitive that I get hard from the idea of being caged where I won't be able to get hard.


Cheating and Honesty

A young woman and man embracing while outdoors.Image via Wikipedia
Read a bit about cheating over at Anonymous 8( The Many Voices of Infidelity, Cheating on a Cheater ), and then was just listening to the View ( July 2 ) on Hulu, but haven't bothered to finish watching the view yet.  Part of what I hear every time I listen to people talk about cheating on, is the total lack of honesty, and almost emphasis on not telling, do to children, money concerns etc, or perhaps that these people are just not monogamous inclined.

The thing I rarely hear anyone talk about, when they do talk about cheating is the why did they cheat? why wasn't it something they where open and honest with their partner before it came to cheating?

I am a strong believe that you need to try and be honest, I know its often times easier said then done, but ultimately if you don't come clean and tell the other person for fear of letting them down, hurting them, hurting your family, its just going to grow into a bigger problem and at the same time is going to be a weight that you are taking around with you cause your not talking about it.

Now I don't have a list of studies as to what reason people give for cheating, but lets just take some rough examples to look at.

Somebody cheated cause there isn't enough intimacy in there relationship.
Alright so rather then talk to your significant other about something that is obviously a problem for you openly.  Trying to work out why its not there, how can can you work on bring it out more, is it work, do you have three kids that constantly need attention, maybe your wife is going though menopause, etc.  Your finding yourself wanting to go outside the bounds of your relationship to get sex elsewhere?

What should happen here is talking to your significant other, and trying to find a way to get the spice back in your relationship.  Find out whats inhibiting your ability to be intimate and try to find ways around them or to work out what is causing a problem.  

If you don't talk to your partner its never going to fix, and only going to create a bigger problem by cheating and then either lying about it, or telling the truth that it happened only to late.  Not only that often are they only admitting to the cheating, not the why they did.
You liked things better when you where single, you had sex with more people and didn't feel guilty about wanting to go out to the local sex club to get laid.
There are people out there who just want a open relationship, they try to force themselves into monogamous relationships because thats the way things are "suppose" to be.  Your not suppose to want to live with one person but be able to go out there and fool around or live with more then one person.  While being monogamous works for some people, that doesn't necessarily means it has to work for you.  There are people out there that are more then willing to be a in a relationship where they are a couple but are willing to be with other people outside the immediate relationship.

but this something again that you have to know for yourself and be willing to tell someone you are getting involved with so that they are alright with it.
Your relationship is over, you've tried to fix things but they just aren't working..
If you've tried everything you can possibly think of to fix your relationship and have talked to the person your are involved with honestly about what isn't working for you and are unable to reconcile things, you may start looking for another person to be with.

If for whatever reason you have basically decided that you need to move on, and find someone else, there could be problems such as not payed expenses, our children and possibly others that you may not want to bring up, or been advised not to seek divorce until after you can find a way to support you and your children, or the bills are payed or whatever needed to be done.

And its important i think that I note while I'm writing these things, they are the way I think I would like to handle them ideally if I was the one thinking of being with someone else.  That I would like to be honest and upfront about everything.
Ideally should be able to say that while things aren't working out, lets least take care of these things before we go ahead and leave, though there may be more immediate reason to leave if the situation is abusive.

If you in a abusive relationship, get out, do whatever you have to get out.  I don't care if you have kids together, I don't care that you have expenses, get your ass out of the relationship now.

This may be all a bit idealistic, but I think its important that you should be comfortable enough to talk to your significant other about what is working in your relationship, what you think could be better, and understand that while you may wish for something to be different, you may have to come up with some creative compromises to make things the best they can be for you.


Domme by Default

Thought today, I would post a review of a e-book I ready last night and finished this morning titled Domme By Default.  I haven't really been one to read erotica much.  I do from time to time, though, honestly in the past its just been to help me get some sorta of extra stimulus when I couldn't watch a porn video.

Part of the reason I got this book though was that it also was on BDSM and had a female dominant as the main character.  Over all I enjoyed the book, but I think it could have ultimately have been better.  It felt a bit rushed and some points where just not expended upon to much.   Such as the talk the friend of the main character gives to her husband on the phone.

I'm going to have to use words like her or him to refer to the characters as I'm sitting here scanning back over the pages of the text to see if anywhere in it that it refers to their names, but I don't believe it did at all.  This may have been purposeful to help put you in the story, but feel it leaves a little be to be desired.

That said I felt I needed to write a review of the book as it did give me some points to think about as I was reading it.  It also brought up a bit of one thing I think could be hot, but then don't know for not having experienced as of yet, which is to be "fucked" by my Mistress.

It also brought out a bit about the selfish submissive which I think sorcha had brought up to me one night, only in a different way, where we had talked about how its not about what I want.  I still find possibly some fault there, but I generally know what she meant I believe.

Some of the good points that I liked was the mention of things that well aren't really new to me, but I felt where some places it did deliver somewhat well where things like a "day collar" and a "play collar."  The collar I wear at this very moment, while typing this and have worn for four months now, is what someone could call a day collar, I love my day collar and that it is a reminder for me, even if no one else noticed or cares, but is a reminder to me that I am Cridhe's.

But the idea of a play collar, or at least the more prominent, you can't mistake this for something else collar excites me as well.  I think it would be sort of nice to have a nightly ritual or whatever time it is when we are home and not going anywhere a more bold collar may not be as welcome to have a thicker collar with the D-ring for a leash to be put around my neck.  Heck when I meet with Cridhe I just want to take this one off and have Her put it back on me just for the sake of having her "collar me" in real life.
"Behind him from the doorway, I watched as he stared at his reflection and ran his fingers over the collar, his smile etched on every inch of his sweet face."
Another point that it brought up that I don't think I've really heard put into words in such a way before was the idea of a "dom drop" or a time where the dominate in the relationship just needs some relax time, time to just be a couple and unwind or perhaps something else.  The book does give a bit of a interesting way the husband surprises his wife way of doing this later in the book that I'll leave out for a couple reason.

I did sorta like the conversation between his wife and her friend Tony who helped her when she was struggling at one point, being new to being the dominate, not something I am sure I would have to worry about with Cridhe, but I thought would most likely be useful to others in knowing that you can't very well expect someone to know somethings you haven't taught them.  It could be obvious to you, but they might not find it so obvious.
"You know these things," he patiently explained, "but you can't expect him to know something he hasn't been taught."
So anyways think over all I'd recommend reading the book to anyone interested in female dominance or being the one rule by such a female.

Four Months

Was trying to think a bit about what I would post as I should have wrote a bit before now, least feel like I should for well, what readers who are reading this would know. Know one has really asked about the post so much. Though I did have Candella ask me after the post was made if I was doing alright.

Candella and I haven't been in touch much since I left her collar and eventually ended up in Cridhe's but I do still talk to her from time to time.  Cause even though I decided that I didn't think that Candella and I was the right fit, I still would like to be her friend.  She is someone I will always care about regardless of who I am with, or what collar I wear.  I do still have the bracelet that she sent me around here some place.

Anyways I don't want to dwell to much on what prompted the transgression, not that it is not important, but want to focus on what is important to me, and that is my Mistress Cridhe.  I do want to say this, it was hard admitting that I had betrayed her trust in me.  I did not really want to tell her.  I thought about just trying harder and pretending it didn't happen.  But I couldn't do that, not to my Mistress who I love, even though she wouldn't know it if I didn't tell her, I would and that was reason enough for me to tell her.

I want to be fully honest with my Mistress, I want her to be able to trust me, and to be open with her.  I want both of us to be able to speak our minds as much as possible.

One thing she said sorta took me a back a bit, "I love making him cry because he's gone all mushy inside over something I've said or done." I do not think I have actually come right out and admitting that there are times when my eyes do well up with tears at how happy my Mistress makes me.

The distance right now between us, physically is a bit draining at time, its hard to always center myself in the distance cause there is so many times I just want to be touched by her, and to be able to touch her in return.  Right now I am just sitting here missing her terribly as its nearly one in the morning here and I should be going to bed soon, as it will be my bedtime.  I want my time with her though, i crave my time with her.

Right now we have been celebrating months since we have come into each other's lives, but I've thought a few times that after we met and after its been a year that perhaps we would go to only celebrating the years we have been together, but perhaps not.  Who knows, some time from now maybe I'll be saying well today is our seven year and four month anniversary and have someone ask me why I still count the months? and perhaps reply with something along the lines cause it would be a bit to tedious to keep track of the minuets that I have been with her.  Not that I remember the exact time, other then it was in the evening that I got the collar and put it on.

I'm still a bit worried about this coming fall cause I do need to try and find where we can spend some good quality private time together and not have to worry to much about my room mates or other people.  If anyone around the Claremont, New Hampshire area ends up reading this and has some ideas, please do share.



On July 3rd, 2010, lion and I celebrated our 4 month anniversary. I know some people think it's a bit silly to be celebrating monthly anniversaries at our age, but I think it's important, for several reasons.

The main reason, though, is a reminder to lion how special he is to me, and how blessed I feel to have him in my life. The week leading up to this anniversary highlighted how important that reminder is. Anyone who read lion's last blog post will know that we hit a bit of a bump in our road together. But it was dealt with. And I think lion is much happier now, despite the fact that it may be a long time before he cums again.

As an aside, although I've told him, I want to say it again, in print that anyone can read... I am incredibly proud of lion for confessing the transgression. There was no way I would ever have known about it if he hadn't told me, and he had to know that I would be disappointed, and that the punishment would be unpleasant, at best. And yet he still had to courage, and honesty, to confess. And that just makes me glow with pride in my own.

Back to the anniversary stuff...

Aside from the reminder to lion how important he is to me, celebrating monthly anniversaries has another benefit. It satisfies the absolute mush in me, and gives me a reason to spoil my boy. I love surprising him. I love making him cry because he's gone all mushy inside over something I've said or done. I love him... What else needs to be said?